Escaping isn't a solution

I slept for about 16 hours today. Finally went to church after not going for almost a month now. The launch of the album, All for Love, by Planetshakers would be next week. I invited a few of my friends over, including Chris. I really hope Chris can make it though. He always makes my day. Met up with Fredrick and his friend, Jimmy and we went for dinner at Carnegie. We had korean food over at a restaurant called Kimchi. There's one outlet in the city too but the one in the city mainly uses the hot grill thingy. The food was nice and it was a little spicy. We went to Koko Black at Carlton thereafter for Hot Chocolate. It was nice.

It's already week 13 - the last week of lessons for the first semester. I just realised while chatting online with Chris just now that I only have 3 hours of lessons on Tuesday, 3 hours (or 1 hour, tentatively) of lessons of Wednesday and 1 hour of lessons on Thursday. No lectures, practicals or tutorials on Monday and Friday! I'm planning to start studying tomorrow as well as starting on my essay which is due on the 16th.

Some people like to think. And it hurts them either physically or emotionally. There are just issues to be faced. However, escaping and avoiding from these issues are not solutions. The issues would just come back haunting and taunting you time and time again.

Sometimes, I really wonder if I've made the wrong choice in being so open. I've been very open to one particular person. In fact, if that person asks me anything, or even my secrets, I would just confide in that person and would tell that person everything. This might not be very good, as it can be used against me. I would however, in turn, expect the person to be able to share his or her problems with me as well. But the fact is that the person isn't. Perhaps, I'm in somewhere new and this person is my closest friend. In fact, I would say that this person is the closest I've ever got to someone (both in Singapore and Australia), who isn't my partner. And that person is someone who has lived here for all his or her life and I'm not the only person here. It's never easy, but one can always try. But before that, one will have to change their mindset, give themselves the chance to do so and try doing it. If not trying anything and not giving themselves the chance to do so, one would never be able to achieve it. We need to take a step out of our comfort zone. We tend to look at the negative side of things, that when we do so, things may be against us. But, that is always not the case. I took a step out of my comfort zone and made a big decision, by faith, by coming to Australia.

I went to the overseas education agent's office in Singapore. I enquired about the course. It really bothered me. There were so many factors to consider. My friends, my family, my business, the cost and such. I was also never a clever student, barely passing my tests and exams in school. That was the reason why I didn't take my O levels and chose to go to the Institute of Technical Education instead. How I passed my Diploma in Mass Communication's just another miracle. Even till now, I do not even know if I'll be able to pass the 3 papers next month. However, I took a very bold step and a leap of faith. I decided to come to Australia. My parents were shocked. My mum was initially unsupportive but decided to let me come in the end. Cost was a rather big factor as well. Ever since I left Singapore, business hasn't been doing well. I am not from a well-to-do family. My mum resigned to take care of me while I was 14 and my dad's the sole breadwinner of the family. He has since retired and is currently working to past his time at the same company, on a contract basis till the end of August. No one knows if his contract will be renewed. Once the funds of my family's depleted, I would have to fly home immediately. It was another big leap of faith when I signed up for my hypnotherapy course. The moment I stepped on board the plane and settled onto my seat, as the plane took off, I just simply broke down.

I guess it's enough said for tonight. The more I blog, the more upset, troubled and worried I become.